TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the first Matrix movie, the central character, Thomas “Neo” Anderson, gradually begins to suspect that his entire understanding of reality is a delusion. At a key moment, a mysterious ally named Morpheus offers him a choice between two pills. If Neo takes the red pill, Morpheus tells him, he will be able to see the truth he has been blind to. If he swallows the blue pill, he will sink comfortably back into the lie he has been living. I see the coming weeks as a comparable turning point for you, Taurus. Which will it be, the red pill or the blue pill?

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Novelist Ursula K. Le Guin decries the linear perspective that dominates modern storytelling. She says it’s “like an arrow, starting here and going straight there and THOK! hitting its mark.” Furthermore, she complains, plots are usually advanced through conflict, as if interesting action can’t possibly arise from any other catalyst. Your assignment in the coming week, Taurus, is to rebel against these oppressive conventions. Boycott any story whose narrative drive is fueled primarily by painful events. Protest movies that imply most human experiences are fraught with difficulty and resolved neatly. Most importantly, look back and celebrate the luminous mysteries that have shaped your life story: the meandering fascinations that didn’t lead to tidy conclusions, the wobbly joys that fed your soul, the adventures whose success was built on sweet breakthroughs rather than triumphs over suffering.

I’m not sure that I agree with the basic premise that development isn’t fueled by pain at all.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The world’s largest private bank, Citigroup, has agreed to stop financing projects that damage sensitive ecosystems. It has promised to invest more in projects that use renewable energy and to pursue policies that protect indigenous people. How did this impossible dream come to pass? The humble but dogged environmental group, Rainforest Action Network, creatively pestered Citigroup for years until the corporation gave into its demands. I see a comparable David-over-Goliath victory in your future, Taurus, so keep plugging away at your quixotic quest. For inspiration, recall Margaret Mead’s words: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.”

You are the
Timekeeper
Some Timekeepers: Cleft (Rayearth), Gandalf
(LOTR), Pluto (Sailor Moon), Zelgadis
(Slayers), Yuki (Fruits Basket), Tezuka (Prince
of Tennis), Aya (Weiss Kreuz)

Which Immortal are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): University students in Poland have discovered an unexpected way to boost their grades: wearing red underwear while taking tests. Ever since researchers presented evidence of the “red underwear effect,” clothing stores have reported a run on scarlet-hued bras, underpants, and boxer shorts around exam times. Maybe it’s merely the result of mass hysteria, but what difference does it make if it truly enhances the students’ performance under pressure? I suggest you consider hopping on this trend, Taurus. What have you got to lose from regularly donning red skivvies during this, the final-exam phase of your yearly cycle?