Written on the shuttle in to work this morning, starting around 7:45 AM Pacific Time.
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I had a dream last night that Yahoo was the same as General Motors. I was going to work here, in California, but I was also going to work with at GM. I don’t think that this implied anything about the stability of Yahoo, or the local economy; that’s night and day. I was telling myself that the reason I am so worried about measuring up and about being able to actually do the job is because it’s a real, adult job. It’s one of those jobs that you can spend your entire life trying to secure. I’m still wondering why I’ve had such a hard time getting jobs outside of Lansing in the past, and yet was able to land this one.

I haven’t had any coffee yet, so I apologize if I’m rambling. I had to run to catch the shuttle, so I’ve got the usual dose of legs-on-fire.

I was feeling under the weather last night, so I picked up a carton of orange juice for Vitamin C, and some salted peanuts for protein. My diet has changed so much since I got here, that I have no idea what I’m getting enough of, and what I’m not. The food is amazing, and I am getting a kick of eating out every night, but there is still that question. Anyway, I feel better today, and I’m hoping that it lasts into this evening. 2001: A Space Odyssey is playing at the Castro in 70mm.

On top of being not-quite-sick, I’m homesick. I can’t remember being homesick before. Most of my friends and all of my comfort spaces are on the other side of the continent. I caught myself thinking the phrase “back east” last night. I find myself ecstatic that my nine to five schedule here (or 7:30 to 7:30, with the shuttle rides) lets me keep in touch with second-shifters and my late-night friends over IM. But I still really miss faces, sounds, sights, and smells.

The shuttle is just now getting on the highway. Bumper-to-bumper. YES!

With the time that it takes to get to and from Sunnyvale from San Francisco, I find myself questioning my decision to live in SF. I have to keep reminding myself (and being reminded, thanks ) that it’s okay to question my direction and pick it. Nobody’s life is riding on this but mine, and so I need to pick what’s going to work out the best for me. I think I’ll look at the available public transportation in Sunnyvale. From the shuttle’s window, it’s looked pretty damn good.

San Francisco is overwhelming. It’s not just the people, though it stems from there being so many. Culture shock, maybe? Everything’s got that ground in dirt that comes with being old, and with being used by so many people. The sidewalks, bus stops, everything. It’s not the grime of Detroit, to me. It’s not abandonment. It’s incredible amount of use. That’s good, right? Argh, now I’ve strayed away from the point. I can feel it.

San Francisco is awesome. It is incredible, filled with culture, amazing people, things to do night and day, more bars than you can shake a drunk at, and life. It’s filled with life.

But when I get home for the day, I have two and a half hours to myself before I’ve got to be in bed, just to catch 8 hours of sleep so that I can catch the shuttle out in the morning. That feels a hell of a lot like the commute from Shelby Township to Ann Arbor and back. This time, someone else is driving.