While we aren’t getting much sleep (and by we, I mean mostly my wife), she is already sleeping more steadily than her brother did until he was about 10 months old. She is just now noticing that we have faces, and pays very close attention to them and how they are moving. I can’t wait for her to start mimicking expressions and for her to realize that those arms, legs, hands, and feet are hers.
As usually happens with new babies, every moment of our days and nights are taken up with taking care of her. Her older brothers are all proving that they can take being her big brother very seriously, and are doing everything that they can to chip in. We’re trying to make sure that they’re included in her birth and growing up, instead of being pushed aside. As with Cian and his older brothers, it seems to be working rather well. In all honesty, I would have never thought of it… all credit for that idea goes to my brilliant wife.
With the lack of free time, I’m taking notice of a pattern that I seem to have in my life. When do I come up with the great, inspired ideas? When I have no means or time in which to accomplish them. When do I have the most drive and motivation? When I am unable to take action. I have the sneaking suspicion that my brain is tricking itself. When there is no ability to do a thing, there is no associated risk with it. I don’t have to fear failure, I don’t have to fear success. I am safe to dream, because I’m barred from action.
Well, I’ve decided to double-trick my brain. This barring of action due to every moment being either spent with Acelyn, or with the boys, or with the wife, or doing chores around the house… it’s a lie that I’ve told myself. I’ve scraped some time out of my lunch hour at work, and during my shifts to stay awake at night during feedings*, and I’ve managed to get words down on paper. I’ve nearly completed the scripts for Issue 2 of Fight or Flight, and have some crazy new ideas for The Glass Crown. Remarkably, the fear of both failure and success has kept quiet during this double-trick.
Maybe my wife was right all along. Maybe I can write and be a parent at the same time.
*Nursing can give a strong feeling of euphoria. When tired, this can easily lead to falling asleep. As I have a sleep disorder, we’re trying to avoid co-sleeping with Acelyn as much as possible. So, when the wife crashes while nursing, I stay up until the baby is done, burp her, and put her to bed. We swap shifts for this duty every three hours, and except for a few missteps on my part, it’s working out quite well.